I was reminded recently of a sequence from the TV show Friends, where Chandler goes on a date with Rachel’s boss. He ends it with “Well this is great, we should do it again, I’ll give you a call” despite not enjoying himself or wanting a second date, or having any intention of calling her. Rachel calls him out on it and tells him he has to go on another date but end it...
What do your habits add up to? I’ve been talking a lot about building habits lately. In one sense it is one of the easiest things out there: pick the thing you’d like to make into a habit then do it, consistently. Yet forming helpful habits (or breaking unhelpful ones) can be one of the most difficult things to do. We have such inertia in our current existence. So much of what we do...
How many times today have you said “I know”? Or perhaps you just thought it to yourself, alongside an inward eye roll. The moment it happens is usually the moment we stop listening, the moment we stop seeking to understand, and the moment we stop being curious. We do it all the time. It’s a natural extension from the automatic system of our brain – designed both to protect us, but also to not...
I love getting things right. And I love being right. If I’m not careful, a decent part of my brain at any given time is taken up working out what the current rules are of whatever “game” or role I’m playing, and then striving to follow them, do it right, be perfect. Sound familiar to anyone? For a lot of high achievers, this is what we learned to do as we grew up, and...
I live life at a pretty fast pace. I’ve never been someone who spends my holidays sunbathing on the beach – boredom kicks in after around 5 minutes, quite aside from the fact that being a redhead means I go pink very fast too 🙂 The way I know how to live life is to fill my days, doing lots of different things; being busy has always been a badge of pride, a measure...
How many of us really love ourselves – wholly and without conditions? Many of us would answer that with a “sometimes” or “yes, except for that bulge in my belly, or my fat thighs, or…”. Or perhaps you answer with a yes, but deep inside you see yourself as a failure every day, or not as happy/slim/successful/fit/wealthy* (delete as appropriate) as you should be, or compared to your friends or colleagues. If so, there...